The changes in your life that only you yourself need to make 🚀
Should we change for love? This is the question that people who are not satisfied with their partner ask themselves. It is often said that you should not change for someone. However, there are some things you can change, but others you should not even consider. In any case, general behavior does not have to be changed but can be improved if the person is aware of his or her behavior and intrinsically wants it.
What changes should not take place for love?
Changes in your close circle of friends and family.
If you have chosen or accepted certain people in your life, no one else should take them away.
It is not up to others to decide whether or not this person should stay in your life. Your partner can help you and enlighten you on the fact that some people are harmful to you, but it is not up to him/her to change things in YOUR life. And even less if it is an action of jealousy, because he/she can't stand the people around you and fears them. Surround yourself with the right people and only bring about change if you want to.
Changes related to your culture and religion
As for the entourage, you should not give in to a "whim" of your partner to change your culture or your religion. Your culture is your belonging to a place, people, with your customs. As a couple, you have to make compromises for the relationship to go well, but you should not make a total change for the other, at his convenience. And even less on this point!
Make sure you communicate about your respective limits, what you accept and do not accept. If your boundaries are too far apart, you have a mutual job to do in trying to understand the other, but without imposing it. If neither of you is willing to make a personal effort on your culture-related boundaries for this relationship, then it's best not to continue the relationship and to be with someone who will accept things (and you will too!).
For religion, the same is true. Even if it is often linked to your family environment and education, you are free to think and practice as you wish. You believe in a god, you believe in extraterrestrial life, in certain passages of the Koran, the Tora or the Bible... You can also have a spiritual belief... well your partner must accept it and not make you change. If he/she wants you to forget your beliefs for him/her, then it should stop there. More generally, your partner should not change your beliefs and values. They are the very foundation of who you are. If they need to be improved, it will only come from you.
Changing your life goals
Changing your life goals and your future is also a strictly personal wish. Depending on your life path and experiences, you create your aspirations and base your ambition. Do you prioritize your career or your family? What is your biggest dream? Thinking about these elements is fundamental to finding meaning in your own life. If you let someone else dictate your life goals, you will only be a shadow of your former self because they will not be your own goals. Your partner has his goals, you have yours. It's up to the two of you to make sure they match by discussing them, but your partner doesn't have to impose his or her vision and a change in your life on you.
Change your imperfections
Like all the previous points, your imperfections are part of your charm and your person. You can improve them, by being willing to do so. This is the personal development. But in no case should this change be imposed on you. The person has accepted you with your qualities and your defects. Moreover, you must understand that perfection does not exist. If YOU want to improve your defects because they weigh you down or because you could be better, try. Otherwise, don't change for anyone.
See also: The advantages of being single